Falling off the Tracks

I'm one of those people.

That person in school who was always asking the teacher "why?" and "how?" and "what if?"

I'm certainly not what one would consider to be a "good student," but I am a learner through and through. I get frustrated when I stop learning and feel stymied. This problem isn't restricted to just classes in university, however. No, it follows me onto my horse. When my instructor tells me to bend the neck for the canter depart, I want to know why. And I usually don't get a response. Then I usually find out that the original instruction was wrong and Lord help me, then.

I spent three years under the tutelage of a local tyrant of a big name trainer. She was horrible, but she knew her stuff, and I'll be damned if I didn't learn more in my three years with her than I have throughout the rest of my riding "career." Everything she taught me was backed up with factual information. It wasn't just about riding and getting over the jump - it was about learning. WHY you have to ride that way. WHAT happens if you don't do that. HOW that influences your horse. WHEN you should use it, and when you should resort to something else.

Now that we've parted ways, I've hit somewhat of a road block. My monthly lessons with Miss Sherry are great. But once a month doesn't do it for me. Not when I have to go back to my instructor who fails to explain the "how's," let alone the "why's." Most of my instruction consists of her yelling "wiggle your fingers!"

There's no doubt that I love her. I wouldn't ride for her if I did not. But I've been having a crisis about the fact that I'm not learning with her. It's very frustrating for someone like me. But I'll continue to ride, and read, and study. Maybe I'll have an "aha!" moment.